Walking the Line Between Generosity and Overselling in Interviews
TJ Kastning
Self-presentation in interviews is a delicate balancing act. On one side, you want to showcase your strengths, aspirations, and potential. On the other, there’s a risk of crossing the line into overselling or even deceiving, whether intentionally or not. Striking the right balance is critical not only for landing the role but also for setting yourself up for success once you’re in it.
So, where is the line between being generous and optimistic about yourself versus overselling or deceiving? Let’s break it down.
What Does Generosity Look Like?
Generosity in self-presentation means framing your experiences and skills in the best possible light while staying truthful. It’s about:
- Highlighting Transferable Skills: Emphasize how your previous experience equips you to excel in this role, even if the context or industry is different.
- Sharing Your Aspirations: It’s okay to talk about where you want to grow and what you’re excited to contribute, as long as you’re clear about your starting point.
- Owning Your Learning Curve: If you don’t have experience in a specific area, focus on your ability to learn and adapt rather than trying to obscure the gap.
Generosity means believing in your potential and advocating for yourself with honesty and enthusiasm. It’s about leaning into your strengths without pretending you’re something you’re not.
What Does Overselling Look Like?
Overselling happens when optimism crosses into exaggeration or dishonesty. Examples include:
- Inflating Achievements: Taking sole credit for a team accomplishment or overstating your role in a project.
- Overstating Skills: Claiming expertise in areas where you have only limited experience or none at all.
- Hiding Weaknesses: Pretending that you’re flawless rather than acknowledging areas where you’re still growing.
The problem with overselling is that it sets up unrealistic expectations. If you land the job under false pretenses, you risk being unprepared for the challenges ahead, damaging your reputation, and straining your relationship with your employer.
The Risks of Deception
Deception, even in small ways, undermines trust. Employers rely on interviews to assess fit, and misrepresentation—whether about your skills, experience, or even your motivations—can lead to:
- Mismatched Roles: You might end up in a position you’re not equipped to handle, leading to stress and underperformance.
- Damaged Relationships: Once discrepancies come to light, trust between you and your employer is eroded, making it difficult to build a strong working relationship.
- Career Setbacks: Misrepresentation can hurt your reputation and close doors to future opportunities.
Hard-Hitting Examples of Lack of Authenticity
Example 1: Inflating Leadership Experience
A candidate claimed to have led a team of 20 people in their previous role, positioning themselves as an experienced manager. In reality, they had only occasionally supervised a small project team of three. When they were hired into a managerial role requiring oversight of a large department, their lack of leadership skills quickly became evident. The stress of managing a role they weren’t prepared for led to mistakes, strained team relationships, and their eventual resignation after only six months. This left the employer scrambling to fill the position again and damaged the candidate’s professional reputation.
Example 2: Hiding Gaps in Technical Skills
A candidate applied for a role requiring advanced knowledge of a specific software tool, claiming they were proficient. In truth, they had only a basic understanding and hoped to “figure it out” on the job. Within weeks, it became clear they couldn’t meet the technical demands, leading to missed deadlines and frustration among their colleagues. The employer lost trust in the candidate’s abilities, and the candidate’s confidence took a severe hit. Ultimately, they were let go, and the entire hiring process had to start over, wasting valuable time and resources.
Example 3: Misrepresenting Project Leadership
A candidate boasted about “building” a $20 million luxury home, giving the impression they had led the project from start to finish. In reality, they had only worked on a small part of the project and were not in a leadership role. Worse, they had been dismissed from the project due to performance issues. Once hired into a role requiring similar high-level project management, their lack of expertise became painfully obvious. The employer’s disappointment and the candidate’s inability to deliver led to a swift termination, creating reputational damage for both parties.
How to Stay on the Right Side of the Line
To balance confidence with honesty, consider these principles:
- Be Specific: Use concrete examples to illustrate your skills and achievements. Specificity builds credibility and avoids overgeneralization.
- Acknowledge Growth Areas: Employers value self-awareness. If you lack experience in a certain area, frame it as an opportunity to learn and grow.
- Speak to Potential, Not Perfection: It’s okay to be optimistic about what you can achieve, as long as you’re clear about where you’re starting from.
- Avoid Absolutes: Instead of saying, “I’m an expert in X,” say, “I have significant experience in X and am excited to deepen my expertise further.”
- Be Prepared to Back It Up: Anything you say in an interview should be supported by examples or evidence. If you can’t back it up, don’t say it.
Questions to Ask Yourself
Before presenting yourself in an interview, reflect on these questions:
- Am I being truthful about my role in past achievements?
- Can I provide examples to support every claim I’m making?
- Am I framing my growth areas as opportunities without misrepresenting my current abilities?
- Will what I’m saying set realistic expectations for the role?
Conclusion
The line between being generous and optimistic versus overselling or deceiving lies in intention and transparency. It’s about advocating for yourself while staying grounded in truth. By presenting yourself authentically, you not only increase your chances of landing the right role but also set the stage for a successful, trusting relationship with your future employer. Confidence and honesty aren’t mutually exclusive—together, they form the foundation of professional integrity.